Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Quick thought on Christmas Eve

I spent the weekend with some of my family vacationing far from home. We attended the branch in the town near where we rented a cabin (so posh ;) and really enjoyed their Christmas program.  It was a simple program; the congregation sang seven or eight different Christmas hymns, with a member of the branch introducing each one with a short history or testimony of the carol.

One sister (who I assume was in the Primary leadership) spoke on how much she loved hearing the children sing "Away in a Manger," particularly the third verse. She said how touching and faith-affirming it was to her to remember those words: "Be near me, Lord Jesus. I ask thee to stay close by me forever and love me, I pray. Bless all the dear children in thy tender care and fit us for Heaven to live with thee there."

It won't be a surprise to those who know me well that the week before Christmas has been a confusing and difficult one for me. I have had a few micro-struggles with my testimony and I've been feeling a very all-encompassing sense of loneliness and worthlessness.  I've looked at others who face struggles and have found myself envying the relationship they have with their Savior, the relationship that enables them to say, "Yes, I'm lonely, but I love my Heavenly Father and His Son and I feel their love." I wish I had enough faith so that my relationship with Jesus Christ filled in those gaps, those insecurities and that loneliness.

And yet, the lyrics are there and they fill me with hope. As I've said before, I have no idea what path my life will take, but I hope with all my heart that the Lord will come with me wherever I go and that whatever path I take, I will leave enough room for Him to walk beside me.

Be near me, Lord Jesus. I ask thee to stay close by me forever and love me, I pray. Bless all the dear children in thy tender care [and I hope that includes me], and fit us [me?] for Heaven to live with thee there.

2 comments:

  1. 1. I know that my Redeemer lives.
    What comfort this sweet sentence gives!
    He lives, he lives, who once was dead.
    He lives, my ever-living Head.
    He lives to bless me with his love.
    He lives to plead for me above.
    He lives my hungry soul to feed.
    He lives to bless in time of need.

    2. He lives to grant me rich supply.
    He lives to guide me with his eye.
    He lives to comfort me when faint.
    He lives to hear my soul’s complaint.
    He lives to silence all my fears.
    He lives to wipe away my tears.
    He lives to calm my troubled heart.
    He lives all blessings to impart.

    3. He lives, my kind, wise heav’nly Friend.
    He lives and loves me to the end.
    He lives, and while he lives, I’ll sing.
    He lives, my Prophet, Priest, and King.
    He lives and grants me daily breath.
    He lives, and I shall conquer death.
    He lives my mansion to prepare.
    He lives to bring me safely there.

    4. He lives! All glory to his name!
    He lives, my Savior, still the same.
    Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:
    “I know that my Redeemer lives!”
    He lives! All glory to his name!
    He lives, my Savior, still the same.
    Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:
    “I know that my Redeemer lives!”

    -GMSW

    ReplyDelete
  2. Merry Christmas GMP! When I allow the Savior to walk with me, my path is always the right one. I pray the same for you.

    Steve

    ReplyDelete

Be nice, mmmmkay? I allow anonymous comments, but not anonymous (or even attributed) douchebaggery. The Gay Mormon Pioneer's tolerance for hate and venom are incredibly low, but his love of communication and debate are high, so have an opinion, but be kind and gentle when you share it.

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