Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Strange new sensation- I want kids?!?

I love kids. I have a bajillion nieces and nephews, each of which is unique and has something that I love about them. I've been a manny for my sister and for a few other people's kids and it's a job I both like and am good at.  I like kids of all ages, from my newborn baby niece to the teenage punk across the way who sometimes helps me with my car.

In spite of that, kids have never really been a part of my plan. I always figured I'd have kids someday, but honestly, I never really wanted them. It kind of seemed like an obligation more than a desire (marry, procreate, die).

But lately, I find myself dreaming of my kids and how awesome they'll be. It happens at random times. Yesterday, I was at McDonald's with my friends after FHE and there was a mom getting an ice cream sundae to share with her maybe-two-year-old son; looking at them made me want a kid.

Then, a few days ago, I was out camping and all I could think of was my own dad and how when I went home for my vacation, I wanted to spend a weekend camping with him, which then led to the thought that I want to take my kids camping as often as possible.

And my good friend announced to me awhile ago that she and her husband were taking the leap and were going to start trying to have kids and it made me so happy. I'm so excited to see that happen for them and it made me want that to happen in my life too.

I just find myself dreaming about kids a lot now. It's a weird development for me, but I'm definitely glad it's there. I've always been worried that I'd view kids as an obligation and be somewhat bitter about it, but now I have a bit more hope that I'm gonna be a good dad.

However, there's still that niggling issue of being uninterested in creating one using the biological process. I guess I'll have to give myself time to come around to the idea of doin' it to make a baby.

EDIT, two hours later: Just found out my sister's preggo! They were tryin' for a boy and I've got a good feeling!

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