Commenting policy

I had the unfortunate experience of removing a comment on my last blog post, the first one I've ever removed.  I'd like to lay out a commenting policy to ensure that such a thing doesn't need to happen again. The comment I removed was written by a person whose opinion I value, but his statements were uncharacteristically rude. I've discussed the issue with him and he took it well, so I'd like to explain it here as well.

Comments that are incendiary in any way, i.e. designed to cause discord or create an argument, will not be tolerated. There is a calm way to present your points and an argumentative way.  Choose the former.

Comments that target me for my choices will not be tolerated either.  I love hearing people highlight blind spots in my thinking or encourage me to make better or more whole-hearted choices, but this blog is supposed to be a safe space for me and hearing judgment from others will not be tolerated.

Similarly, I will not tolerate comments targeted at others' choices or viewpoints.  See the above point about making your differences known in a kind, respectful way.

Comments that target the gay community, the LDS church or religion in general as being an all-consuming evil will not be tolerated. I cannot stress this enough.  There is great value in religion for many people, and there is great value in support that comes from living an authentic life and seeking support from like-minded individuals. As a man straddling the two often-disparate sides of the issue, I see how both communities do great work and how both fall short.  I will not tolerate someone presenting an entirely one-sided view of the matter.

I considered disallowing anonymous comments for a time.  I eventually came to the conclusion that the gay (and Mormon) community is one that values anonymity as a safety net, and to be an anonymous blogger that doesn't allow Nony's comments would be the height of hypocrisy.  However, I do not appreciate the anonymous commenting option being used by people who want to present incendiary or rude opinions without fear of ramification. That, to me, is using anonymity like a coward might.  Please, if you're comfortable, leave a name or use an approved login to comment.

As always, please let me know via e-mail if you have any issues or questions not appropriate for public discourse. gaymormonpioneer at gmail dot com